My Worst Facebook Password Ever…

Roughly 5 months ago, I wrote a post entitled “The Un-Stepford Wife Confessions” that, for the most part, seemed to go un-noticed.  I’ll freely admit that I was more than a little surprised at the lack of reaction that specific post garnered… especially from the one I call Hubs.   Just in case you’re too lazy to click that damned link that I just worked my butt off to add to the post… I’ll give you the break-down.   Hubs pisses me off… often.  Following one of Hub’s Jerk moments, I made the decision to change my Facebook password to something kind of mean… about him.  I have been extremely lazy and just got around to changing it… today.  So, did you get all that… if you didn’t, just go click that freaking link.  It will take a moment of your precious web-surfing time and I can almost promise that it will make you chuckle and shake your head at me and my noticeable immaturity.

So, basically… to make a long story short, for the last 5 months I have been typing “HubsLikesCock” into my computer every single time I wanted to log in to Facebook….  Are any of you actually friends with me on Facebook?  I am on there… A lot!  Multiple times a day… I probably end up physically logging into my account at least 7 times a day.  That’s 7 times every single day that my fingers basically have to call Hubs out his name… Roughly 861 separate times total!  Some days it’s funny, those are the days when he’s angered me… the days when he’s a douche…. the days when he carelessly leaves his Band Aid wrappers laying all over the house.  I have absolutely NO PROBLEM AT ALL typing in my password on those days.  I push the keys with a little more passion… I might even yell out “Burn!!!” upon completion of typing the password. If Hubs walks by while I’m pecking out those words… extra points!  Burn Hubs, BUUUURN!”

Burn Hubs

But, what about the other days?  The days when he’s not acting like a jackass… The days when he comes home with a huge bouquet of flowers, just because…. Ladies, what is our first instinct when we receive gifts such as that?  “Hmmmmm, I’m gonna take a picture of these big ass flowers and post it to Facebook so everyone will be jealous!!!”  All is going well until I sit my butt at the computer to upload the picture… “Lalala… Best Hubs Ever….” *types email address* “Lalalalala… Suck it, friends that didn’t get some big ass flowers tonight” *begins to type password*   …. awe, hell.  There’s no way around it… I mean you have to actually log in to even attempt to change that damned password.  Basically, Hubs just showered me with niceness… and now I have to repay him by reminding the Facebook Password Troll, once again, that my Hubs allegedly likes cock.  Ummm… thanks for the flowers, babe?
Bad PasswordWhile this may have seemed like a bitchy thing to do… I actually toned it down a little.  When I was initially in the rage that led me to create this password, I was originally planning on using the phrase HubsLovesCock.  I ultimately decided that “Loves” was too strong an emotion and downgraded it to “Likes” …. You’re welcome, Hubs!

So, my password is now changed… and it was absolutely nothing to do with Hubs at all… and as a funny little side-note, this entry will be where he, also, learns about the scandalous password for the very first time.  *waves*  Love you, Babe!

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  • whatimeant2say

    That is such a wonderful idea! I might consider opening a Facebook account specifically for that purpose…

  • My Half Assed Life

    At my last job we used to have to change passwords every 3 days – months – whatever. Depending on my mood I sometimes wanted to have nasty passwords but I was always worried the IT department had some super secret way to see what everyone’s passwords were.
    My Half Assed Life recently posted..Cat Fight ContinuedMy Profile

  • Tim

    Remembering the Dr Strangelove scene, the mad scientist mentions that keeping the Doomsday machine a secret is unclear on the concept. So is the insult password. The satisfaction of such a PW is that everyone knows. So next time post it for us all to logon with.
    Tim recently posted..War Averted, NY candy store halts invasion of CanadaMy Profile

  • beccajean73

    I nominated you for the leibster award. Check it out at

  • gina valley

    So, now I’m feeling a little better about y raunchy password! ;-)
    gina valley recently posted..I Wish I Had Lofty GoalsMy Profile

  • The assholes dad who is also an asshole

    Wow I know one person who’s not getting flowers for ever!